He Has a Name. It's Chris.

Chris.  Or Jose, depending upon your relationship with him.  His God given name is Jose Christopher Trujillo-Daza.

They all have a name.  It's Mark.  And Martin.

These are the three men who I will be riding for beginning this Friday in the 2019 Police Unity Tour with Chapter IV.  This is my ninth Tour and, since 2015, I have been participating in it to honor police-related suicides.  This is contrary to the original intent of the Tour.  The Police Unity Tour was started in 1997 by two New Jersey police officers to bring awareness and honor to those public servants that had been killed in the line of duty.  The problem?  Each year, more law enforcement officers take their own lives than are killed in the line of duty.  According to the National Law Enforcement Officers Memorial Fund (the Tour is the Memorial's primary supporter), there was 150 line of duty deaths (LODDs) in 2018.  In that same year, Blue H.E.L.P. recorded165 suicides.  To date, NLEOMF lists 40 LODDs and Blue H.E.L.P. reports 76 suicides.

Seventy-fucking-six.

No way.  This is not happening.  It can't.  That is simply unacceptable.  Period.  And that's why I have been riding for these individuals...to raise awareness - to provoke ACTION - as to what is happening to those that help others.  The stigma of seeking help that engulfs our first responder professions (and military) is killing us.  Literally.

I have had the tremendous honor to talk to Chris' family and friends.  What an amazing young man he was.  He was loved.  Chris was a First Class Petty Officer assigned to Port Security Unit 313 out of Coast Guard District 13.  PSUs are deployable units that provide force protection and security to forward operating naval bases and are almost exclusively staffed by reservists.  Chris was a boat driver, a boatswain mate, for the unit.  When fellow Coasties talk about him they use words like honorable, respectful, dependable, intelligent, and likable.  How I wouldn't beg for a member like Chris to be on my team.

And his family adored him.  His older brother, Paul, told me that their hero, their leader, was Chris.  Paul looked up to his little brother.  They both went to aircraft mechanic school and then worked together for six years.  Chris dreamt of one day becoming a police officer and, presumably, used his duties and responsibilities with the Coast Guard to hone his leadership skills and officer safety tactics.  He loved serving.  His community.  His country.

Chris loved his mom.  Tragically, six months prior to his suicide, his mother lost her battle to cancer.  Paul knows that her loss took a heavy hit to Chris.  But, with this stigma strangling public safety professions, he was reluctant to seek out help.  So, we lost him.  (Many times, a traumatic catalyst like the loss of a family member sets a loved one into an abyss.  Keep that in mind if you know someone who has experienced such a loss.  It could be a trigger.)

And we lost Mark.  A beloved 43-year old police officer in Lancaster, Pennsylvania.  A father, a brother, a friend, a son.

And Martin.  A dedicated sergeant with the New Jersey State Police.  A husband, a father, a son.

This shit has got to stop.  It simply has to.

So, I ride for these three...and all the others.  My journey to honor them starts on Friday.  All participants in the Tour wear an "honor band", which is an engraved metal band with the officer's name, agency, and end of watch date.  We wear this band as a way to remember the loss during tough times on our ride.  It reminds us that our "tough time" is nothing - nothing - compared to the challenges and struggles that the families, loved ones, friends and other survivors go through each and every day since their loss.

But police-related suicides do not get the same honor.  They must, however.  I mean, it's on The Wall (the Memorial)...

 "It is not how these officers died that made them heroes, it is how they lived."

- Vivian Eney Cross, Survivor
(husband, SGT Christopher Eney, EOW: 24 August 1984)

So, I ride...again...for heroes like Mark.  Martin.

And Chris.